It’s a we  problem

Sexual addiction cannot be overcome alone. That being said, in the words of the founder’s wife, Theresa: “This is a ‘we’ problem and not a ‘he’ problem.” Therefore, although this page is designed for wives, it also has a note to husbands that sets the stage for ushering healing to their wives. Both spouses should read this page and be committed to living out each of the six components of a Proven life.

There is hope!

God changes hearts and lives, just remember that this applies to you too. To live in peace and contentment you have to have an intimate, daily relationship with Jesus.  Begin the process by focusing on your own shortcomings and sins.  Have you been angry, bossy, bitter, or too picky?  Acknowledge and confess your sin.  It’s natural to blame your sins on your husband but don’t let anything stand in the way of your goal to restore your relationship with Jesus and your husband. Pray, “Create in me a clean heart, Oh God.” (Psalm 51:10)

Just as Jesus has forgiven you of your sins, forgive your husband and anyone else who has hurt you (Ephesians 4:32). Otherwise, bitterness will consume your heart and will destroy your relationships with your husband, Jesus, and many others.  Also, seek out a godly woman in whom you can confide.  Be wise with what and with whom you share. Remember, the ultimate goal is to restore broken relationships. The woman you seek should gently show you your weaknesses and strengthen you.

Make it your number one priority to grow in your relationship with Jesus.  Pray that your husband will pursue Jesus with all of his heart but don’t let your growth be dependent on his. Take comfort in knowing that you can have peace through Jesus Christ during the difficult times ahead.

Click here to read an article for wives.


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It’s necessary to involve your wife in the healing process.  If you have withheld love or intimacy from your wife due to the selfishness associated with your sexual sins, confess this to her. Ask for her forgiveness.  Specifically confess the true nature and scope of these sins. Be humble and sincere as you commit to bring healing into both of your lives.  At first your wife is likely to be upset, perhaps even unforgiving. Be patient. Healing the hurt takes time. Your wife may not trust that you are truly sincere.  You must rebuild the trust that you have violated with humility and love.

Allow your wife to share in your victory over sin and help her to develop a stronger relationship with Christ as well.  Joel’s wife noticed that he no longer made excuses for his failures.  He was, instead, taking responsibility and strived to be a godly husband.  It took time but she finally began to see that Joel had truly changed. Theresa enjoyed Joel’s change because he was becoming a more godly husband. Joel’s excitement and diligence towards Jesus (and away from sexual sins) encouraged her to be more excited and diligent in her relationship with Jesus. Today, their marriage is stronger than ever.