By: Alexander Jackson
DECADES OF ADDICTION
Did you try to kick any habits before your wedding? Maybe you’re not married yet but that’s your plan. How fast can you drop a porn addiction?
Reddit users don’t find it very easy. The Reddit subcategory for porn addiction is heartbreaking to read. (If you check it out, take a chaperone. I had my wife with me for that one.) The titles alone tell the story: “I can’t live with or without porn;” “I don’t even know where to begin;” “Been addicted to pornography and masturbation for 17+ years, I want free. Please help.”
The posts tell the tales of addiction lasting ten years, thirteen years, fifteen years, with many of these addicts fighting for their marriage. My addiction lasted 11 years before I kicked it, and I consider myself fortunate that it didn’t last longer.
The link between mind and body is intricate. Watching porn rewires your brain. It fills your memory with images deeply linked to powerful sensations. Every time you submit to the urge, you forge a deeper bondage to the chemicals of cravings, losing that much more control. How do you escape pornography before one decade becomes two?
THOUGHT CONTROL
It’s common to see mind control practiced against other people in science fiction and fantasy, like the CIA brainwashing of Jason Bourne, or like the Imperius Curse in the Harry Potter series. Self-help culture takes a different approach: “mind hacks.” Tipsters have loaded the internet with lessons on how to trick your mind into new thought patterns.
Is your brain a computer? That’s a different question, but if you treat your brain like a computer, can you “hack” your mind? Can you learn personal thought-control and conquer a pornography dependence on your own?
I performed a mind hack once, if you want to call it that. I used to bite my fingernails until they bled. It was embarrassing. I got fed up and started clipping my nails every single night, even when there was barely anything to clip. The practice trained my mind to think there was nothing to bite, and the urge eventually left.
I didn’t enjoy biting my nails. It hurt my fingers and looked gross. I was often barely aware that I was doing it, so I used a mental trick known as a “good habit” to stop the bad habit.
The porn addict doesn’t have it so easy. Why not just distract yourself and ignore the urge?
Awareness is the problem.
The pleasure of awareness feeds a pornography addiction. The memory of that single-minded focus on immediate satisfaction drives the user to go back again and again. Each return further desensitizes you to watching empty people have empty sex. How do you re-train your mind to find that disturbing instead of enthralling? 
I was there once. I know it well. The impulse to surf the sleaze overrides the commitment to stop. We become resourceful at justifying the need, at downplaying the harm of “just a few pics.” We sabotage our goals and then beat ourselves up because our willpower failed.
Simple mind hacks won’t cure a porn addiction. Body and mind are intertwined, so how do you harness both?
LOVE THAT GIVES US HOPE
We need a power greater than porn, a reliable form of body and mind control. Lucky for us, there is a good God who gives us both and calls it self-control. Why is self-control important to God? Because He cares about our dignity. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind…”
Transformation is exactly what we need. We want to act with more control so we stop falling prey to our addictions. Renewal—letting God give us a new mind—transforms us. Renewal changes our mind by changing our vision of what is good and true. Changing our mind then transforms our heart and we end up loving new things.
These are separate processes, renewal and transformation, but they’re related. We will only chase what we know is good if we also love what is good. Then we become satisfied with new things, good things, things that promote life and freedom instead of slavery and shame.
Defeating a porn habit takes practice. It takes hard work. It takes the goodness of God, who transforms our hearts to hate addiction. Then, through Christ, we can fight this bondage and win the freedom of self-control.
RENEW YOUR MIND RIGHT NOW
Want to start right away? Memorize something that will renew your mind. King David said he learned God’s words by heart so that he wouldn’t sin (Psalm 119:11). Scripture memorization is like a workout for your soul. Try one of these passages if you need a good place to start:
- Psalm 1, a vision of the blessings for those who love the things of God;
- Psalm 23, a sketch of God’s character as seen in different seasons of life;
- Matthew 5:1-12, a list of ways God rewards and cares for humble people who seek Him;
- Colossians 3:12-17, a model of the mind and heart devoted to Christ.
Read these in context. Imagine Jesus himself speaking these words to you. And remember that God isn’t looking for mindless robots to obey the rules. He wants people to love what is good and join Him in doing good things.
The more we love the things of God, the greater our sense of dignity. Galatians 5 lists the virtues that the Holy Spirit nurtures in our lives (verses 22-24, if you want to memorize it.) The last item on the list is self-control, and that’s important. See, self-control is the Biblical version of mind control. It’s the Holy Spirit mind hack.
So maybe a mind hack can cure a porn addiction. Just be sure you choose the right one.
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Alexander Jackson lives in Lynchburg, Virginia with his wife and three kids. He’s had more jobs in more industries than can fit in this bio. With a degree in English, he spends his free time writing about God, beauty, and robots.