By: Shane James O’Neill
4 min. read
From Social Play-Boy to Social Celibate
Since playing his role as Legolas in the cinematic version of Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings, Orlando Bloom has been a social play-boy and the heart throb of girls and women, alike. And the romantic–fandom only grew after he co-stared in the Pirates of the Caribbean series.
Orlando Bloom lived into the lifestyle of easy sex because, after all, why say no to women who are more than willing to jump into your bed?
But non-intimate sex left little room for actual love, actual companionship, and little room to actually be known. So, a friend challenged him to go six months without hooking up. And Bloom took him up on the challenge. Which is significant, because that friend was essentially challenging Orlando Bloom to be celibate and abstinent for 6 months.
During the abstinence, Orlando Bloom had some major discoveries. Namely, Bloom realized that his relational expectations were keeping him from actually connecting with women and developing friendships.
From Sex to Porn
But Orlando Bloom didn’t just use porn as a substitute for his abstinence from sex. He decided to go all in. If he was going to practice a time of celibacy, then he was actually going to do it. Not for other people, not for social opinion, not to look good, but for his own growth and healing. No sex, and no porn.
All of that is to say, Bloom knew something was wrong with his sense of love and affection so he committed to pursue healing by getting distance from his expectations for pleasure, not just trying celibacy in moderation, but full, committed abstinence.
In an interview with the U.K.’s The Sunday Times, Bloom shares some of his reflections from his experience of abstinence: “Porn is super-disruptive to your sex life, to your libido…” He goes on to say, “They’ve done the studies, they can’t find any kids who don’t watch it. When you watch multiple people at multiple times in one evening, how is your actual real-life partner going to match up?”
I’m not endorsing the entirety of Orlando Blooms sexual ethics. Really, I’m only pointing to this singular event in his life. But man is it cool to see how this one event has so reshaped his understanding of people, his sense of friendship, his humanity, and his approach to pleasure!
(Accidentally) Following Jesus
Another interesting aspect of Bloom’s journey is that he (likely, accidentally) practiced the Jesus Way — a command and praxis that Jesus gives His disciples for following Him.
Specifically, Bloom practiced Jesus’ command about lust from Matthew chapter 5: “If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.”
Bloom was living something hellish — a loveless, affectionless, lifeless romance — and so he cut and gouged out the problems. Instead of allowing his entire body to continue on in that hellish existence, he ripped away the empty, superficial pleasure and began to know people as actual people, rather than continuing to teach himself through porn and hooking up to view people as a means for his own pleasure.
Something New
Even Proven Ministries own founder, Joel, when he first came into the light with his own sin some 20 years ago had to initially get rid of the TV, unsubscribe to magazines, leave his computer at the office, and practice real relationships. He cut and gouged out all the temptations in his life.
Porn conditions our expectations for romance, our expectations for love and intimacy. Porn isn’t just something we do in private. It’s something that impacts every area of our lives by conditioning our desires, our standards for sex, and our view of people. It’s humbling to realize that Bloom was honest with himself while so many Christians refuse to be. Lest you think I’m talking at you, this convenient hypocrisy includes me as much as it does anyone else.
It’s always going to be true that porn uses people for self-pleasure, and anytime we watch porn we are using people for our pleasure.
Related: Stepping Stones to Healing
Becoming Human
Jesus’ invitation to us is similar to the invitation Orlando Bloom’s friend gave him — cut out the issues that are teaching you to dehumanize others, at whatever the cost. Your humanity and the dignity of others is worth any price.
Of course, Jesus’ invitation is both wider and deeper — the hell we experience here is a faint echo of the hell we could actually find ourselves in; we aren’t on this journey alone, we have Him and His family, and His grace can do more than change our perspective, it can redeem our abused souls; people are remarkably valuable because, in real ways, they are made in God’s image and they uniquely look like Him, so whoever wholeheartedly loves people is loving God (1 John). The list could go on and on and on. In fact, it does (— insert entire Bible as reference, here).
But it is worth noting that Bloom’s knew humanizing view of life is directly connected to his six-month (accidental) expedition on the Jesus Way.
Orlando Bloom found that much transformation after only six months of saying ‘yes’ to dignifying the bodies of others. Imagine what a life time of such a practice could accomplish, imagine living the full invitation, imagine the witness such a life would be to a dehumanized and lonely culture. Just imagine.
Well, actually, don’t just imagine. Imagine and invite Jesus into those imaginings, and ask Jesus to take you on that journey, because that journey is His Way.
Begin imagining, starting severing, and follow that guy, the One who will make all things new.
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Shane James O’Neill is the Editorial Director for Proven Men Ministries. He is currently working on a graduate degree in apologetics at Liberty University’s Rawling School of Divinity.