By: Jane Claudio 

Basics from the Playground

Cheaters never win.

This is something that we learned early, something we chanted from the playground. If you’re not playing by the rules of the game, you might be able to finagle your way into ending with the most points, but ending the game with the most points isn’t the same as winning.

What is Winning?

When we want to “win,” we are after so much more than just having more points on the board. We want to feel the sense of accomplishment. We want to know the satisfaction of being the winner, taste the confidence, see the triumph. But a cheater doesn’t experience any of these things. Maybe they do feel a tinge of victory in the moment, but deeper than that, they feel a sense of fraud. They know they haven’t won anything. 

Sex bots

There is a new product gearing to be released on the market: a sex doll with personality. That’s right, a replica of a woman, with a porn-star body, that demonstrates sexual desire, connection, humor, and the ability to surprise.

This is mind-blowing and heartbreaking.

The developer of this product says that he wants their customers to have a real bond with their robot partners.

This says something about our society, and even more than that, about our humanity. How is there even a market for this? Don’t we know this is the essence of cheating?

Human connection is so central to person-hood that we’re selling off human intimacy. Our culture has decided to self-sabotage and cheat itself out of divine gifts. 

To state it another way: We’ve learned that humans need something so desperately that we’ve created an artificial supply for our inherent demand. 

Where is God in all of This?

The Designer of sex wanted those who experience it to have a real bond with their life-long partner. God himself originally wanted us to have desire, connection, humor, and surprise. So why are people paying thousands of dollar to get it from plastic?

How deeply saddening that we’re outsourcing this gift to robots. 

Something C.S. Lewis said is a beautiful voice in this conversation:

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea.”

The True Gift and Design

If only our society could realize that God designed sex and intimacy for our pleasure and for the grand purpose of connection. Remember that God imagined sex first. Society is casual about sex, and they love it that way: pleasure without promise. But don’t you realize that God’s version is so much better? What God designed for us in marriage includes a physical thrill and an emotional connection. He makes it even better by coupling it with the safety of a no-matter-what commitment, and made it endless with an entire lifetime of exploration.

God also designed sex and intimacy with covenant in mind. A covenant is stronger than a contract; it’s a promise that is kept even when the other person doesn’t hold up their end of the commitment. What a beautiful picture of God’s relationship with us. He promises forgiveness and new life through the cross and empty tomb—even when we don’t hold up our end of the commitment. That kind of unrestricted love and security is exactly what our good God always wanted for us.

And we’re settling for dolls?

Let’s remember that God’s intent for intimacy is greater than anything we could fabricate. Marriage and sex on earth are only a sketch that represent God’s desire for us and his covenant with us. It’s Great News that we don’t have to settle for a knockoff, like a sex doll. God designed us for more—if only we are willing to receive it and wait for it. Do not sell yourself short.

Intimacy without fidelity will always leave you broken — whether that’s with an actual human, or a robotic one.

Cheaters never win.

Continue to partner with ProvenMen as we help to equip the Bride of Christ to be pure in a culture bent on perversion. 

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Jane Claudio is a singer/songwriter living in Nashville, TN with Jeremy, her husband of 2 years. They enjoy making music, traveling, and cooking together. You can check out more of her writing and her music at Janemusicofficial.com